Thinking of conceiving a child via surrogacy? Here is the journey of a NYC's surrogacy and family law attorney
After learning about the surrogacy journey of my friend Brittney Sobel, I realized there are many legal steps when it comes to finding a surrogate. In December 2019, Sobel welcomed her daughter after a long, arduous, and emotionally draining surrogacy journey. Sobel's experience led her to assist those parents wishing to build a family via assisted reproduction.
I asked her a few questions about her experience. You can find them below alongside the video she posted on instagram.
If you could go back in time, what would you change about your surrogacy journey?
Nothing. It is easy to want to wish away our decision to transfer two embryos, which ultimately led us to reduce our triplet pregnancy to one. But I believe our journey led me to be a stronger, more resilient woman, and a fiercely devoted and protective mother.
While my surrogate was anticipating, others would say “Enjoy those early days, months, years because it goes so quickly,” or “Don’t blink because you’ll miss it.” I think for a lot of mothers, by the time they realize this truth, it’s already too late.
In a lot of ways, my journey made me appreciate how precious time becomes when you become a parent. Yes, I had countless moments of despair, of wishing away the sleepless nights and feeling as though I was hanging by a thread. But from the moment Sloane was born, I wanted time to stand still.
Would you do it again?
What advice would you give to a friend going through this process?
If you are afraid of the unknown of parenthood, let yourself be shown. There is a big community of women supporting women and the power that comes from sharing your feelings and feeling heard is undeniably healing.
How did you feel when you saw your daughter, Sloane, for the first time?
The moment that Sloane was placed on my chest, the weight of it hit me hard. Her heartbeat was at one with mine and it was as if her beating heart instantly opened mine beyond measure. And while I protected her only from afar while in utero, I knew that from that moment on, nothing could separate us. For she is here and she is mine. And I am forever her mama.
How was your postpartum period?
Transformative. The special attachment Sloane and I formed in those early months will stay with me forever. It’s what sent me into her room in the middle of the night at the slightest whimper and what makes me want to instinctively care for and nurture her.
Brittney Sobel in her own words
If you’d like to contact Brittney Sobel about surrogacy services, you may find her information below:
Check out these resources for those who want to learn more about surrogacy:
- What is surrogacy?
- The experience of surrogate mothers
- Surrogate mother, trust, and the family
- Surrogate stories: Why I became a surrogate
Edited by: Lily Zara