I remember when I got Covid in early March of 2020. We didn’t know much about the virus and the internet was full of terror. Being a new mother of a 7 month old baby and feeling so sick was scary. For the first time in my life I was afraid of death. I kept asking myself, Who’s going to take care of Jasper if something were to happen to me? My body kept on trembling and my heart beating so fast it felt as if I was going to have a heart attack.
Though the first 14 days of the virus were the worst, I really didn’t get out of bed for a month. What got me going was Louise Hay's morning and evening meditations as well as Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power Of Now.” I remember listening to Tolle while I sat in my bathtub soaked in epsom salt. I heard him talking about the spiritual term ‘Die Before You Die’ which means self liberation prior to physical death.
I connected with what he was saying since I was dealing with my own fears of death. I paused the audiobook and did some research; here is what I found:
One of the most interesting videos I watched about the subject was from Bentinho Massaro. Not only does he explain it thoroughly, but he also shares a meditation that helps you detach from ego and self.
It’s been over a year since I got Covid and the ‘Die Before You Die’ experience. Ever since, my life keeps on evolving with more self liberation and detachment. I said goodbye to my condo in Miami Beach and traveled out west with my family. For over three months we slept in airbnbs, we focused on being with each other, being with nature, and getting to know the states of Colorado, New Mexico, and Arizona like locals. I embraced the new, the simple, and living out of a suitcase for several months. Matter of fact, I’m still living out of a suitcase as we speak.
Nevertheless, just because I decided to “die” before physical death, it didn’t mean that my life changed overnight. The process of releasing attachments, in other words, what we perceive as stability, automated thoughts and feelings, and co-dependency from people and places is still happening. Most importantly, the process of letting go of fear is still going on e-v-e-r-y-d-a-y. For me, it’s been a practice worth doing.
A year has passed and the pandemic continues. The trauma of this past year is felt everywhere I go. It seems as if we've forgotten to make eye contact and everyone is looking down. Other than the fact that looking down strains the neck and causes imbalances, we’ve become afraid of each other, and our daily consumption of screen time has increased.
I personally understand the traumas related to this pandemic, but allowing the body to let go of fear may bring you more peace, presence, and gratitude for what’s here now. In addition, releasing fear may alleviate tension in your shoulders, neck, and overall body.
Looking at the root causes of fear is like looking back at our human history. It has caused so much division since the beginning of time. Civilizations have been brought down by it. Lives have not been lived to its fullest because of it. Fear has the ability to cripple us. The rulers of the world often use fear as a weapon to gain power and wealth over people. We’ve been programmed but…
Just like everything else, fear is an unconscious habit and it can be broken. Becoming aware of yourself, of your own fears, and what holds you back is the beginning of breaking the invisible cords that tie you to the person you wish not to be. The practice of releasing fear will move you towards a more pleasant and exciting future.
Exhale Fear Meditation
I’ve attached a few articles below so you can learn more ways to let go of fear:
- Total Surrender: Die Before You Die (by Bentinho Massaro)
- Let Go of Fear by Stopping the Stories in Your Head
- 5 Ways To Let Go Of Fear
Edited by: Lily Zara